Communication Skills for Women in the Workplace

Why can't a woman be like a man? Why is it that women need a different strategy to be successful when working with men or in a male-dominated company or business? How come women can't just do what we feel comfortable with and break through the glass ceiling? There are three reasons just for starters: Men don't like questions. Women do. Men don't have high-pitched voices. Many women do. Cultural expectations are different for men and women. Women are raised to be nice. Men to be right, which is why many men don't like asking for directions and women can't figure out what the fuss is all about! So let's start with one simple technique that you can use right now today to improve your communication skills with men. Stop asking questions. Instead use statements or simply give instructions. You can practice right now with your husband, mate, or children. Instead of saying, "Hi honey, how was your day?" try this, "Hi honey, tell me about your day." Notice the subtle difference. You will... Read More →

Life Coach: Your Happiness Project

Studies have shown that people who feel more successful than their friends are happier than people who feel less successful. That made me laugh—maybe all you need for happiness is poorer friends! The Dalai Lama says most people base their happiness on comparisons to others. A study evaluated lottery winners and the impact winning had on their lives. The same researchers also studied another group—paraplegics. The study revealed that six months after winning the lottery or becoming a paraplegic, both groups had the same level of happiness. So winning the lottery will make you just about as happy as becoming a paraplegic. I stopped buying lottery tickets. Why buy a ticket if all you need to do is jump in front of a bus? (I’m not jumping in front of any buses either!) Here’s a much more useful tip: First, write down everything you would buy, do, have or be if you did win the lottery. What changes would you make in your life? What would you do differently? Then, make those changes... Read More →

Organize Your Life

If work expands to fill the available time, the solution is to reduce the amount of time you have to get the work done. When pressed, most people can get the job done in half the time they are currently using. Have you ever noticed that the day before you are leaving for a trip you always manage to clean out an entire in-box that has been jammed for weeks? There is nothing like an incentive to get a body moving. How could you get your work done in half the time? It may take some creative thinking, but it is well worth the effort. If you have a pile of paperwork on your desk, set an alarm for one hour and see if you can beat the clock. Tons of files to clean up? Set a morning aside and get a buddy who wants to work on a project of his or her own. Every hour call each other up for a two-minute progress report. One of my clients kept saying she was going to clean up all the piles of papers in her office, but it just wasn't getting done. We set up a Saturday morning, I worked on my in-box... Read More →

Communication Skills: The Powerful 4-step Communication Model

Can you hear me?

A great step towards improving your communication skills either at work, or in your personal life, is to establish a list of your boundaries and let others know how you'd like to be treated going forward. It requires a bit of re-education on your part as in effect, you have 'trained' people to treat you the way you do by not saying anything or allowing the unwanted behaviour to occur. You can change this immediately by using this very powerful, four-step communication model. This works on everyone from bosses to children, but in order to work, you must use a flat, neutral tone of voice for all four steps. No anger, righteousness, indignation, snideness etc. You may need to calm down with a few deep breaths so that you can speak calmly and neutrally. You'll want to speak just as if you were stating a fact like, “The sky is blue.” 4- Step Communication Model: Inform. e.g. “Do you realize that you are fifteen minutes late?” Request. “I ask that when you are meeting me, you... Read More →

How To Attract Success: Do Work You Love, Discover Your Natural Gifts and Talents

Some people seem to be born knowing what their natural gifts and talents are, and they know exactly what they want to do in life. I was a bit jealous of these people because I was born with a strong sense of purpose, feeling that there was something important I was supposed to do, but no clue as to what that might be. I was pretty good at a lot of different things but not so extraordinarily good at any one thing. It just wasn't obvious what I was supposed to do. No one attracts success more than someone who is doing what he or she loves to do. When you are doing what you love, your eyes sparkle, you are happy and excited about life, you are full of energy and joy. You feel satisfied, content, turned on. Given all this, why don't we do what we love? It is perverse how much time we spend doing what we don't love to do. The latest research indicates that 50 percent of the western world is in the wrong job. Given the amount of complaining I hear at parties, this seems to be a fairly accurate... Read More →

Life Coach: Use the Career Change Kit™ to Find Your Ideal Job

Change ahead warning sign

Hiring a life coach to help you through a period of your life where you might need some extra support to achieve a specific goal – such as a career change, is a practical and rewarding experience. You can arrange to have a fixed period of 1:1 life coaching as a short term way to reach your goal. Changing careers and finding a new career path is also so much easier when we can understand who we are and what we are good at! Each of us is born with the talents to be remarkable at something...the secret is identifying those talents, then working where you can use them. When you need a career change... Sometimes our professions or jobs cause problems that affect not only our working hours but our personal lives. The need to consider a career change is often manifested in job burnout and job stress. To find a cure for a work-related problem, you need to identify the symptoms and the cause. Here are only some of the possible signs or causes: Overwork: working late or on weekends, taking... Read More →

Career Coach: Top 10 Tips to Fast Track Your Career

Career development is one way that we help our clients succeed. Feel free to use this career advice to expand your career options and get on the right career path: Identify your Natural Strengths. Our real abilities are so much a part of us that we often take them for granted and don’t even consider them to be strengths. Ask your friends, family and colleagues to help you identify your strengths, as they may see something you don’t. Writing down these answers is a simple way to start getting on the best career path. Strengthen Your Strengths. Many think that we have to do it all and be good at everything. Not so. Do we care if Michael Jordan can balance his check book? Once you’ve identified your strengths, stop trying to improve your weaknesses as that will only make you mediocre. Focus instead on developing those strengths and delegating your weaknesses. Finding Your Passion and Values. The key to doing fulfilling work is to find a career that is in alignment with your core... Read More →

Invent Five New Careers


If you have found yourself saying “I hate my job,” or if you feel you are stuck in a career rut, then it may be time to think outside of the box. Pretend that your current job has been eliminated from the face of the earth, and you now have to do something completely different. What might you like to do? Pick any five new careers that you fancy. Don't worry if you don't have the training or education. Write a paragraph about why you'd want this career. Then go on to the next career. Why would you want this one? This will also help you figure out what you really value and may point you in the right direction to a possible new career. One client, Jenny, a hardworking forty-five-year-old human resources executive, did this career change exercise and came up with a rather unexpected result. She was surprised when she realized that she'd like to look after other people's gardens. Somehow it just didn't fit with her idea of the executive life she had. Her five new careers revealed a... Read More →

Clear Clutter with the Joy filter

“Unbelievable as it may sound, you only have to experience a state of order once to be able to maintain it.” —Marie Kondo, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Would you like something new and wonderful to come into your life? A new job, a new friend, an opportunity? A relationship? One of the easiest, most effective ways to attract something new into your life is to create some space. If you feel stuck, start clearing the decks. Go through your files at the office and toss out all those old memos, reports, and articles you’ve been saving in case you need them someday. The easiest way to get ruthless is to imagine that you are being promoted and are relocating to another office. I was amazed by one of the sales managers at the bank. She was given a job managing a different team of people, and when she cleaned out her desk, all she had to take with her was one small manila folder. I asked how she managed that, and she said the new department would have all the information she... Read More →

Banish Clutter Forever! One Simple Secret is all You'll Ever Need

On rare occasion I bump into a book that is truly life-changing. And, in most cases, once presented with a truth, it is so incredibly simple and obvious you wonder why we didn't always do it this way all along – like putting wheels on hand luggage. The book is Marie Kondo's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying: A Simple, Effective Way to Banish Clutter Forever. Amazingly enough, it does just what it says on the tin. I've tested it on my own wardrobe and cleared out my clothes in two hours and then eliminated ten big bags in one hour at a friend's house. One of my life coaching clients used this method to eliminate more than 100 books in less than an hour. Another client cleared out 30 work shirts in 15 minutes. It is fast, effective and fun! After years of experimenting with various means of getting rid of clutter, I can confirm this is the simplest, most effective and permanent solution. There is only one question to ask when evaluating whether to keep or discard any object. You must... Read More →

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